Maybe two hundred thousand? And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. [masturbation gestures] It doesnt mean a fucking thing. We'll start with the first three, and I'll use the Roman Catholic version because those are the ones I was fed as a little boy. The only part I would take with a block of salt is the last in which he explains why he doesnt vote. endobj Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. Theyve long since bought, and paid for the Senate, the Congress, the state houses, the city halls, they got the judges in their back pockets and they own all the big media companies, so they control just about all of the news and information you get to hear. << /Length 5 0 R /Filter /FlateDecode >> Better yet, and more ironic, 'THEY TWISTED MY WORDS.' George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. "We're so self-important. Youre just gunna wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans [leaders]. Well, if you ask me, it's more like the land of the self-obsessed and the home of the vain. Carlin was known for his dark comedy and reflections on politics, religion, psychology, language and taboo subjects. George Carlin: How you doing? Everybody complains about politicians. This shit they shuffle around every four years? The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. That's a big activity here in Washington! They're your 'likes'. It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. endobj Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! They don't care about the planet. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money.[6]. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. George Carlin on the language of politics - YouTube And if we had a list like that, I wouldn't mind that brilliant judge in Alabama displaying it prominently in the courthouse wall. And we've all bought into it. Garbage ingarbage out. But it's all a facade. (Yes, I know, the USS America is a humongous, gargantuan behemoth, and the rudder very, very, very small, but we can still make it sloooowly turn to a certain general heading if we all pile our [intelligent] votes in the wheelhouse. Please validate my existence. )'B^E_2yKg&. <>/Metadata 181 0 R/Outlines 136 0 R/Pages 174 0 R/StructTreeRoot 145 0 R/Type/Catalog/ViewerPreferences<>>> From people in all walks of life usually the person in question who has committed some unspeakable act. George Carlin was one of the most well-known and beloved comedians of all time. While breaking down these claims on political correctness, Carlin implements his own set of values. But a comedian has the ability to use their anger and intelligence to refocus and reconstruct their pain into entertainment. Do you? We're addicted to the attention, the likes, the validation. It's like a highlight reel of their fake lives. This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. I'VE FAITH IN THE AMERICAN JUDICIAL SYSTEM. That's always a nice touch, American people. 87 Best George Carlin Quotes On Education, Politics & Life The shit they shuffle around every four years doesnt mean a fuckin thing. I think the list of commandments was deliberately and artificially inflated to get it up to ten. 0000008961 00000 n Carlin took a liberal stance on most things, but generally found politics and politicians corrupt and ridiculous. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? George Carlin - The Ten Commandments | Genius He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1]. . But that would be much too direct! https://ad.style/. ,G0p%:::400-: @%L`n((lax@\0eF,q] \ .P+4 d3;P hnN*S fxsH>XDAA#beae:i5rY3h11(31013a_p_&]37CD\&k2N@TD}. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. Because at the end of the day, social media is just a bunch of zeros and ones floating around in cyberspace. Their own habitat. They own everything. They don't pass through a membrane from another reality. They dont care about you at all at all AT ALL. I think what we really need more of is ritual suicide, you know. We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. See they don't DECIDE; they DETERMINE. People like to twist that around, I know. xWnF}WDh%&^6F%&T{84e[A0@-3wUr-*l:, XF{HT+T0?LL q8"y1yY0LV"vQ|8:GwPBr,&]Qt7oz5n Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window). Now theres one thing you might have noticed i dont complain about: politicians. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. The table is tilted folks. Because if its really just the fault of these politicians, then where are all the other bright people of conscience? Quote by George Carlin: "Forget the politicians. The politicians are Its what our system produces. I dont vote. So Ive made what i hope is a more readable version below, so this classic piece of polemical gold can be shared and understood more widely. The planet has been here four and a half billion years. endobj Everybody's going to save something now. We're all becoming like Goldfish, swimming around in our own little bowls, looking at the world through a curved piece of glass. The stand up comic was an artist who did more than articulate the public's subconscious; he. A person who routinely spends his days torturing the language complains; POLITICIAN:THEY TWISTED MY WORDS. Not in the abstract they don't. Video Transcript - In Defense of Politicians (George Carlin, 1996) "Now there's one thing you mighta noticed I don't complain about: politicians. Theyll get it. Suddenly we're down to four. POLITICIAN:WHEN HE RESPONDS TO MY INITIATIVE, I WILL REVIEW HIS RESPONSE, TAKE A POSITION AND MAKE A RECOMMENDATION. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. (LAUGHS). e d u / e t d / 4 7 1)/Rect[72.0 131.7406 279.0264 143.4594]/StructParent 6/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> While you're here, we have a public discord server. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. 192 0 obj The Wealthy the REAL owners! That's because now he's feeling the heat and so as time passes and more evidence comes in he suddenly changes directions and tells us: POLITICIAN:WERE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS! He was also known for his outspoken views on government and politics. George Carlin's acerbic wit and profound societal insights were a one time cultural phenomenon. Maybe something else sucks around here like: THE PUBLIC. I'M NOT SURE; I HAVEN'T DETERMINED THAT YET (LAUGHS). You have owners. In fact at this point he might even say: POLITICIAN:I'M WILLING TO TRUST IN THE FAIRNESS OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. He was born May 12, 1937, in New York City into an Irish Catholic family, but he rejected the faith. People trying to make the world save for their Volvos. I still cant find a flaw in it, or anything even exaggerated. CNN.com - Transcripts He pretty much smashed the nail squarely on the head. Moses could have carried them down the hill in his pocket. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying, lobbying, to get what they want. According to Carlin, religion is one of humanitys greatest swindles and created nothing but lies, conflict, and suffering. Unless we think of some way to fight back. I just wanna put this thing behind me and get on with my life (CLAPS, LAUGHS). Every time. Good honest hard-working people continue, these are people of modest means, continue to elect these rich cock suckers who dont give a fuck about you.they dont give a fuck about you they dont give a FUCK about you. George Carlin on why he likes disasters and people under pressure, and why the planet is doin' just fine. But really, they're just regurgitating whatever they heard on cable news or read on some clickbait website. Transcript. Some parents deserve respect. Get listed in the most prominent screenplays collection on the web! Here's a transcript of a segment where he talks about it: "Social media, what a crock of shit that is. Sure, there's some good stuff on there, but it's mostly just people filming themselves doing stupid things and hoping to go viral. George Carlin Politicians - YouTube All day long beating you over the head in their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. 160 Copy quote. Retweets do count. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. George Carlin on Voting transcript | iComedyTV.com People go on there, they play with the animals, they pet them, they feed them, but they don't get any real interaction. I do not own this video. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. George Carlin: Life Is Worth Losing - English Transcript Well, where do people think these politicians come from? They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. So I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way: on election-day, I-STAY-HOME. It will be a lot of fun. Maher is a liberal who has endorsed at least the last two Democratic presidential candidates. [wptabtitle]Friends[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][twitter-feed username=shoq mode=search id=323794037750513667][/wptabcontent] @Z(dXSm !4I THE FOOD IS GREAT BUT PUBLIC SERVICE IS TERRIBLE. Quick Guide. Fuck hope. That somehow we're gonna put in jeopardy this beautiful little blue-green ball that's just a-floatin' around the sun? Apparently no one has ever claimed that only a small portion of something (LAUGHS) was blown out of proportion. He missed this one. <>stream And you don't want to spend your real life chasing after digital validation.". It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. A clean place to live. stream The PEOPLE are fucked. However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. Youre just going to wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans. Most are only interested in self pleasures and bad habits. They dont want that! [/wptabs]. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! They want obedient workers. 0000001596 00000 n Now normally during peace times the politician would refer to people in the military as: POLITICIAN:OUR YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN STATIONED AROUND THE WORLD. Given the nature of our current Administration, I thought it timely to revisit what George said years ago (Back In Town HBO Special, 1996) about American politicians and the American people who elect them. George Carlin was known for his insightful and humorous observations on modern society, including his thoughts on social media. It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. Hi speech lovers,With costs of hosting website and podcast, this labour of love has become a difficult financial proposition in recent times. Because if it is really just the fault of the politicians then where are all the other bright people of conscience? I, on the other handwho did not votewho did not votewho, in fact, did not even leave the house on Election Day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain as loud as I want about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with. Yeah, let's share our every thought and feeling with the entire world, because that's what we need, more information. Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. trailer Its hard to say if he was a Republican or a Democrat, however, as he refused to vote, considering it pointless because voting, as he said, is the illusion of choice.[4]. George Carlin - National Press Club [complete] - YouTube I show how there is no direct way to escape politicizing . (LAUGHS). They're your contacts. endobj 0000003180 00000 n They got you by the balls. The only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im gunna have a little something to show for it, folks.. You know, those posts that pretend to be modest, but really they're just a way of showing off. 187 0 obj This is what we have to offer. [wptabs style=wpui-mre-basic mode=horizontal background=false] But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. "George Carlin" Scripts.com. Full transcript of George Carlin's "Dumb Americans," excerpted from "Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theatre in New York City for HBO. Then watch the video. His satirical comments and relentless attacking a damaged system that unfairly trounced on the rights of its . What? Let's get started! And we've only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. The career of comedian George Carlin (1937-2008) spanned five decades, with his first appearance on "The Tonight Show" being in 1962.He was an outspoken, acerbic social critic, and what came out of his mouthcould be shocking or even sometimes vulgar, but often his railings against injustice or stupidity or corruption shone a light on some dark areas as he said things that others would or . I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. You know, that thing that's supposed to make us more connected and informed, but really just turns us into a bunch of self-obsessed, attention-seeking, validation-craving zombies. Marc Allan: Good, thanks for calling. And the greatest arrogance of all: save the planet. George Carlin on the American Dream (with transcript) Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. They own all the important land. I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. TOP 25 QUOTES BY GEORGE CARLIN (of 976) | A-Z Quotes From the late 1980s, Carlin's routines focused on sociocultural criticism of American society. endobj (LAUGHS). 01. (CLAPS, LAUGHS). That's a friend. They want obedient workers. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. To learn more, check out our transcription guide or visit our transcribers forum, Comedian George Carlins take on The Ten Commandments. George Carlin - National Press Club May 19, 1999. Everybody says they suck. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( M o n t c l a i r S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y \n D i g i t a l C o m m o n s)/Rect[308.9844 674.625 540.0 693.375]/StructParent 1/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Compared to the people, the planet is doing great. Carlin is usually spot on. Fuck em! 0 Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? When they're in trouble, their explanations usually begin simply with words like MISS-COMMUNICATION; QUESTION:WHAT DID YOU DO WRONG, SENATOR?POLITICIAN:WELL, IT WAS A MISS-COMMUNICATION.